Thursday, October 24, 2013

'Tis The Season To Bash Twilight

...la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la. Anyway. It is always the season to bash Twilight. It is eminently bash-able. What brings this up today, however, is the fact that I recently found a blog, Reasoning With Vampires, that very slowly, methodically, and hilariously goes through the books and rips apart their grammar and their stupidity.  Warning: bad language, as with 95% of everything on the Internet nowadays. Not for the faint of heart.

I think it's even improved my grammar some. After all, the swamp of commas can drown even the most wary authors, but I generally do use them to indicate pauses - just generally in reading, not in the literary action itself. Also, it has increased my desire to use sentences with simpler structures. I may also be avoiding excessive hyphenation from now on... O.o.

Now, on to the funnies!

This first picture is from Reasoning With Vampires, to give credit where credit is due:


Amen! Sing it, sister.


Yes, please, Dean. (No, not that Dean. Not Dean O'Gorman. This is Dean Winchester from Supernatural. Even I know that.)

I remember someone on Tumblr who said they wanted Robert Pattinson to play a vampire hunter on Supernatural. He wouldn't even have to be a character, they said. He could just be himself - so sick of vampires that he's taken to hunting them. Someone else reblogged this and begged for a petition to be made, saying they were "about 1000% certain" he would do it and love it.

Where is this petition? I must sign it.


For once, I agree with you, Théoden. WHERE WERE YOU, GONDOR??? WHEN OUR HOUR WAS DIRE, WHERE WERE YOUR SCRUBBING BUBBLE GHOSTS OF DOOM TO RID US OF THESE SPARKLY VAMPIRES??

For that matter, where was Rohan's cavalry? I'll take Eomer leading the charge any day... If he can take down a prehistoric elephant, he can take down a vampire.

In Pace Christi,

Elyse

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